January 30, 2013
9:40-10
The Catcher in the Rye
Pages: 194-201

He leaves and it's beginning to show signs of morning. He goes to the station and finds his bags and decides to sleep on the benches but he only gets to sleep until 9 because the place starts to fill up. He starts feeling depressed again and begins to thin of Mr. Antolini and how maybe it was a misunderstanding and is grateful for the advice and everything he's done for him. Holden isn't feeling to well and finds a magazine and begins to read it. However, it's a health magazine and he's worrying about his hormones and how he might have cancer. He leaves to get some breakfast but is having difficulties swallowing so he just drinks a coffee and starts walking. He sees all these Christmassy things and remembers times when he took Phoebe out around this time a couple years ago. However, he starts feeling very anxious and is worried about crossing the street and is sweating a lot. He starts pretending to talk to his brother and asks him to make sure he crosses the street safely and when he does he thanks him. He then decides he's never going home again and he's going to go to the west by hitching but he's going to give Phoebe her money first and say goodbye. He makes up a whole future where he would pretend to be deaf and mute and fill people's cars with gas and oil and build a house outside a forest and marry a deaf mute girl so he wouldn't have to talk to anyone. He wants to say bye to Phoebe so he goes to a store and buys a pencil and paper and writes a letter to Phoebe. He goes to her school to deliver it and he remembers when he used to go there. In the letter he tells her to meet him at a museum close to the school when she gets out for lunch. He lies to the receptionist about the message in the letter but she believes him and delivers it. He continues to have a conversation with her for a little bit.

I think there's something wrong with Holden and he needs to seek medical treatment. I think he hasn't gotten over Allie's death and he should talk to a therapist or some professional about it. I also believe this to be the root cause of his failures, constant drinking, talking to himself and other things.

I read well but I started to think about how many people are affected by this and how he should do something about this.